Selected poems from my first book of poetry “Thanatonaut”, published in April 2012:
Poem For Brandon Lee
Why cannot a dream enter my mind
And lock the world’s secrets behind these leaden eyelids
Even if it is only for one night
Alas! The torturing moon lightens your gallant appearance
And with a murderous smile
My angel of darkness, you become
Is it this silent death,
Slowly covering the graveyard of sadness we all mourn in
A visiting place for the restless ones where a single wooden cage thousand wounds Hides
Is it the macabre wind
That is holding your spirit unbound though forever a haunt to me
But I do not wish you away
For I have wished you endlessly, infinitely it seems
Speak forever and the words will place these little shreds of life
In the river of sadness and drown the petty
Deadly kisses through a tangled black web of your hair
Even when small, persistent knives of light pierce through this room
And betray us, killing us back to our covens of solitude
Shall this voice summon you again
Next night’s blessing
Will it be the moment when the whisper comes back
And your laughter sings me to my rest
Tomorrow then, and no more dawns will exist
An actor exits a stage
In a manner the author intended
But I am here, left to ask:
“Have I been here too long?”
Why, this time feels like worm meat
Can I look above my own gaze
And question silently:
“Have you forsaken me?”
(Even though thorns do not frame my head)
Rip out these mannequin strings
And exit the stage myself,
Of my own free will…
Only mindless creatures still roam
This stone-and-concrete stage
When the scenario lies blank
For years now…
Have you exited the stage yourself, Author?
Is that the secret that lies behind
All the curtains
Is that why you play deaf to your
Why, I didn’t ask to be written!
I did not want to leave the ethereal
Blissful, blissless, non-existence
Why should then my punishment for exiting
Be a saw underneath the steps?
Spraying my gut into whatever
Purgatory there exists for write-offs…
I say: this is my own Grand Guignol.
See… I Have A Curse
Through landscapes constructed
By the finest violin sound,
Through the purest springs of hope
Through dust and dirt and lack of belief,
It is written…
It may not be as so…
Yet my mind will cease to exist
Only when these white sheets of truth disappear
And even then my feeling will not die
It will embrace you unknowingly my love
It will protect you from unknown dangers
It will summon you to blissful sleep
Even when you fall to sleep for the last time
See, I have a curse… everything I make goes on forever
And I have just started loving you
You are a knight
Chivalry of yours is unprecedented
You’re the skin, I’m the feather
I float listlessly, forever lost
In another world, in another life
In another time,
We sail on one ship
The galley of dreams
We share one horizon
Marvel at breathtaking sunsets
And we are one
But, my darling, in this world
In this time, you have this life
Away from me
Two ships passing in the night
Where my sunset is, your sunrise isn’t
And we aren’t one
Is this damnation or the ultimate reward?
A smile down from Heavens that struck like a lightning
I’ve never known or seemed to care.
I’ve found us in thousands of songs and
At the same time in none
For this has never been before…
Everything speaks to me softly,
In whispers and caresses,
Your voice echoed through the breathing of this city,
Your eyes shining through the buzzing, dreamy street lamps.
Embraced ever so delightfully by the visions of the gone,
I walk in the present.
Oh, do not be worried, for my life is full,
Brimming with love and laughter.
I’ve cried because of others,
Passion, jealousy, remorse, guilt, all coarsed through my veins,
Spices always came in a mouthful.
And, sometimes, as Ol’ Blue Eyes would say, I even bit off more Than I can chew.
But never, never has one word been written in the name of them.
And my fate has been accepted by
Every single part of me.
A prophet’s gift of eternal devotion!
Perhaps in other worlds we’re together,
However, this world brought me unimaginable bliss,
For I have found you in this vastness.
Now I build temples in your name,
Erect castles high up in the mountains
(The same ones that part us),
Windowed with the finest Italian glass.
Bridges above rivers dark and sharp,
That murmur forever about the one they were created for.
Greatest poets penned your gallant beauty
Centuries ago, without even knowing it.
But I know.
Damned or blessed or both,
Like Penelope standing on the edge of the sea
My love will never grow cold
Even though you will never come back to me.
It’s not a bad way to live, I can tell you
This is not a cross to bear.
Can’t you see?
You are all I carry with me.
Five passed, thousands more to go.